Wednesday, July 31, 2013

Feedback & Opinion Needed!!!


Just wanna have some feedback & opinion from you all...

I attend my friend (i know the couple) mother/mother-in-law funeral on Sunday (28th July). I ask my friend, the wife if wanted to take picture of the funeral, and i could help her with it. She's ok, so i told her i will take photos and after that i will email her.  

After the service by Pastor before the cortege leaves for cremation, the family members went one last round at the void deck of the HDB, the hubby niece came up to me and ask me, Sis, why are you taking pictures, i reply her, i'm helping xx taking pictures and after that, i will email the pictures to her.  She reply me, this is not respectful. After that, i stop taking pictures.

After the whole thing is over, the couple and i went for dinner and i was sharing with them about it.  The wife was mentioning taking photos for memory only and she was wondering how come i didn't take pictures after Pastor service at the void deck.  And the wife was sharing with me a bit about the niece which i do not want to say much.

Just wanna hear from you all whether is it not respectful to take pictures during funeral service.


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33 comments:

  1. 孤Owl的王子- Nick GohJuly 31, 2013 at 1:41 PM

    i personally think is depend on the family member....but since you had get permission (agreement to help) from the family, then should be ok kua..... :)

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  2. Small KucingJuly 31, 2013 at 2:17 PM

    well, since you have the ermission from family members then it's alright la. But have to do it in a discrete manner. Not like snapping photos in a wedding or bday.

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  3. Small KucingJuly 31, 2013 at 2:18 PM

    During my grandpa funeral we had loads of photos. Till now we can still see his casket and his grave

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  4. Small KucingJuly 31, 2013 at 2:21 PM

    "the hubby niece" means your friend's husband's niece? The one who passaway is your friend's MIL?

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  5. AnonymousJuly 31, 2013 at 2:31 PM

    People take photos to keep for remembrance...but I hear there is this custom or superstition that the immediate members of the family must not be the ones taking photos. Friends, ok...

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  6. SockPengJuly 31, 2013 at 2:37 PM

    到底可以不可以？
    如果主人家同意和他们给你拍摄的话，那么就可以了
    主人家说不，当然就不要了。

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  7. UnknownJuly 31, 2013 at 2:51 PM

    I take photos to keep remembrance. My late gradnfather and grandmother I do the same thing.

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  8. UnknownJuly 31, 2013 at 2:54 PM

    Ya lor, you already got permission right? That's very good from the first place.

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  9. Sonia ~ Nasi Lemak LoverJuly 31, 2013 at 3:34 PM

    since you already get the permission, should be alright to take photo.

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  10. [SK]July 31, 2013 at 6:18 PM

    hello there sharon, have a great day ahead.. :)

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  11. 煒霖July 31, 2013 at 9:24 PM

    I think to avoid any inconvenient should make sure everyone of the family members are fine with it or not, because if one of them is not happy then the misunderstanding problem will start! (but I seldom see people take any picture during funeral)

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  12. [SK]July 31, 2013 at 9:25 PM

    i think it really depends on the family, and since you have got the permission from her direct family to do so, it's totally fine..

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  13. HayleyJuly 31, 2013 at 9:45 PM

    Good evening Sharon!
    Today I am a bit late, hehe~

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  14. HayleyJuly 31, 2013 at 9:46 PM

    Well, to me there's no right or wrong. Totally depends on the family members.
    I know many people nowadays don't mind taking photos during a funeral, just for the sake of memories.

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  15. HayleyJuly 31, 2013 at 9:49 PM

    May be there's some misunderstanding between your friend and that niece so made you feel uneasy...
    Hope things are settled right now.

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  16. munJuly 31, 2013 at 11:38 PM

    I don't have any pantang but I think many people who do so have to check with ALL family members - if all ok, then can take photos.

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  17. wennAugust 1, 2013 at 1:06 AM

    I took pictures during my FIL's funeral. I'm still keeping those photos. It's actually for remembrance. But I don't take any other funeral photos.

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  18. LotusAugust 1, 2013 at 1:15 AM

    If you got the permission, then it should be ok, but must be discreet, cos it is a funeral not a party or wedding.

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  19. mui muiAugust 1, 2013 at 9:13 AM

    Hi Sharon,
    Good morning :)
    If you have permission that shouldn't be a problem!
    mui

    ReplyDelete
  20. Somewhere in SingaporeAugust 1, 2013 at 9:17 AM

    Small Kucing

    I know the couple, the niece is the husband niece...

    The husband mother, wife mother-in-law....

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Small KucingAugust 1, 2013 at 10:09 PM

      Don't worry too much about it since all are okay with it except the niece.

      Delete
  21. Somewhere in SingaporeAugust 1, 2013 at 9:18 AM

    Sock Peng

    The family is ok with it, only the niece make the remark....

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  22. ShinAugust 1, 2013 at 9:22 AM

    其实我也会有那种不知道该拍照还是不该拍的矛盾。会想留念，但确实又感觉有点不太尊重。我想大概很多人的想法会是：现在竟然还有心情拍照？！

    anyway既然得到主人家的允可，是ok的。只是他们可能没考虑到有些人是pantang的，之间没沟通好，结果才造成误会。

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  23. ElaineAugust 1, 2013 at 11:05 AM

    Good morning Sharon,
    You have asked for permission and have been given, so that's fine. As long as you have wanted to help then your intention is good. No worries we took photos too of our parents and in-laws as well. Just for memory!

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  24. linaAugust 1, 2013 at 1:48 PM

    Well, if permission iss given... then should be no problem.

    Of course there will be people talking but do what you feel is correct.

    Plus maybe photo taking at a funeral have to more discreet than normal photo taking so as not to offend too many righteous people. xD

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  25. munAugust 2, 2013 at 3:13 AM

    Hello Sharon, just wondering how old is the niece? How come she has pantang like this when the rest of the family does not?

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  26. Somewhere in SingaporeAugust 2, 2013 at 8:08 AM

    Mun

    The niece, ard 20 plus...

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  27. BakericiousAugust 2, 2013 at 8:32 AM

    Hi Sharon I think as long as you are granted with permission, there is no wrong at all.

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  28. mNhLAugust 2, 2013 at 10:30 AM

    Hello...first time here.

    I think it is ok to take photos since u had already get permissions.

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  29. mNhLAugust 2, 2013 at 10:31 AM

    Furthermore, nowadays no more taboos or whatsoever. My aunt passed away recently. Several of us took photos too to show other relatives who couldn't make it to the wake/funerals. Some are staying overseas.

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  30. mNhLAugust 2, 2013 at 10:32 AM

    My uncle kept an album on my late grandma's funeral too. Even took pic of her in the casket. Anyway, condolences to your friend.

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  31. Fay JesseltonAugust 2, 2013 at 12:19 PM

    each individual has a different opinion about that. However, in my opinion, there's nothing wrong with what you did.

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  32. GraceAugust 4, 2013 at 6:59 PM

    个人想法是只要得到主人家的允许就可以拍摄，当做是纪念罢了。

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